Thank goodness for perspective...

Well, here I am back at square one, as AF decided to show her ugly face today once more... Fortunately/Unfortunately something happened to us last week that has cushioned yet another blow by putting things into perspective for me. I almost lost my hubby last week... His appendicitis was misdiagnosed as "food poisoning" and by the time we realized it was something much more serious and rushed him to the ER, things had already taken a turn for the worst and his appendix oozed all over his insides... He spent almost a week in the hospital recovering. Thankfully everything turned out just fine and he is making an astoundingly quick recovery!

Yes, I'm bummed yet another month has gone by and still no BFP. I'm sad, but that's normal and to be expected... how else are you supposed to feel after 3 years of constant failure? However, despite the pain (emotional & physical, as the cramps are a killer this month) I am doing surprisingly well and haven't thrown my ususal "woe is me, life is so unfair, my life is over!" pity-party... why? Well, again, perspective... A LOT worse things than a BFN could have (and almost did) happened to me this month.

So up I get... yes, this sucks... I hurt and I feel like poo on a stick, BUT I have much to be gratefull for... my precious hubby! :)

Here we go again!

Wednesday I went in for my follie-scan and my doctor was rather pleased... more so than me. He was estatic about my endometrial stripe which was now at a nice and plump 13mm (up from 9mm last month and 7mm the month before that) and a good sized follicle at 24.5mm. This little sucker was on my right ovary, but I was sad to see that it was all alone and had no buddy! My doc wasn't very disturbed by that, but I guess I just figure 2 is better than 1, know what I mean? My left ovary was just a mess of PCOS, looked like a cluster of grapes... below is a picture of what PCOS looks like on an ultrasound, although this particular ovary is not mine.

So yeah, that was what my left one looked like. I wonder if she'll ever work? In the past 3 years of TTC, I think it would be generous to say I've ovulated from that side more than once or twice. If I ever lose my right ovary I think I'd be totally screwed b/c little miss lefty here just sits there all cysted up and does nothing, month after month. *sigh* That's a scary thought. I'm having to increase my Metformin dose, in the hopes that this will help with the PCOS.

In any case, I'm officially back in the 2ww... we'll see what time will bring us. I'm trying to be more hopeful this month. My doctor is ever optimistic, and continues to cheer me on and pray for us. If nothing else, I'm so grateful for his care and attention... Infertility is hard enough to have to deal with a doctor that doesn't care or understand. I'm so blessed to have one that takes such good care of me!